I don't normally publish personal posts. In fact I think I've only ever done one or two. I'm more of a "keep it light and funny" sort of blogger, sharing the bits and pieces I pick up on the web. I keep my personal thoughts and feelings to myself, jotting them down in a journal or talking them over to my dearest friends.

Today is a bit different though. I'm stuck at work and treading water in a sea of emotions. Writing just seemed like the best release ...

Death. It is sad, it is scary, it is dreaded. Personally, I do my best not to think about it. I ignore the fact that I'm not invincible. I don't go out and do stupid things, trying to bring my own death on prematurely, but I also don't live in daily fear of dying. I just try to live the life I have to the very best. Let the universe/God/the fates take care of the serious stuff.

But every so often I'm faced with it, faced with death. Today was one of those days. I had two very sad pieces of news. The continued and more serious failing of my grandmother's health, and the death of a friend/classmate who, from outside, looked to have everything going for her and was just on top of the world.

My 90+ year old grandmother was hospitalized after having a heart attack. She also suffers from advancing dymensia. While I wasn't there to witness it, my mother said she was rather combative in the hospital, trying to fight her way out of everybody's hold. She just wanted to go home, even though she doesn't really know where home is anymore. She can't remember the year, let alone the decade, and my mother is easily confused as one of her own seven sisters. An original Southern Belle from South Carolina, Alexine has always been prim and proper but generous, loving, elegant and active. As a nurse in WWII she met and instantly fell in love with my grandfather. They were married in secret almost immediately. To watch such a strong, loving, independent woman unravel, a byproduct of the aging process, has been eye opening and terribly sad. The past few months have been particularly hard on my mother. My grandmother calls her at all hours, confused with how to operate the phone or upset that her clock won't work. My mother's patience is unwavering and her emotional strength is truly amazing. My grandmother has been effectively dying for months now, her body slowly shutting down, and her mind retreating into its own depths. To live to her 90s but to slowly fade away like this. It is heart-wrenching.

But then I got another piece of news this morning. A phone call from a friend revealed that a classmate and good friend of mine died last night due to complications/internal bleeding from a stomach problem. She was 27. Graduating from grad school in May. Engaged. Getting married this September. I'm still a little in shock. Just terrible.

My grandmother in her 90s. My friend in her 20s. One facing death after a full life. One who has died, barely letting her spread her smile and joy very far.

I'm an athlete. I swim/bike/run just about every day. I am scared - truly scared - of the day when I have to stop because my body just can't do it anymore. I'm scared of a day when I might not recognize who I'm with or where I am. I know it frustrates my grandmother. I can see it in her face. She is ashamed when she can't remember a name or place a memory. Like a child who can't remember the right sequence of numbers when counting 1-10 in front of the class. But then there's my friend. She was 27. Quieted too early.

Such opposing forces, such different situations. Both make me sit and cherish the life I have, the life I am living while mourning for both of them. Mourning the life my grandmother can't hold onto, mourning the life that my friend lost.

What a sad and gut wrenching day.

A Magic Wand

Wow. Now you too can be Harry Potter in your own home (just don't try to ride the broom, please!) with your very own magic wand. They Kymera is everything from a universal TV remote to something that can control the fans in your house - or anything with a sensor - all with the flick of a wrist. For real.

Thrillist notes: The wand uses a tiny silicone chip to measure g-forces and detect even the slightest movement in any direction, letting you assign specific motions to particular functions (adjust volume, change channel, skip track ...), and is all wrapped up in a sleek scepter design, with its own presentation box made from "faux dragonhide", since the real stuff is pretty pricey, and is compoletely imaginary.

ENJOY!

Walk a Mile ... or more.

"Lots of people spend a year abroad, but how many decide to spend it traveling thousands of miles on foot? That’s exactly what Christoph Rehage did, and the travails of his journey can be read not just on his blog, but on his face, as you can see in The Longest Way 1.0 Web video.

Setting out in November of 2007, Rehage initially planned to walk from Beijing to his home country of Germany. He didn’t quite reach his goal, but he did walk almost 2,900 miles over varying terrain. He recorded almost daily self-portraits, with diverse locales behind him—the imperial burial grounds in Shaanxi, the Great Mosque of Xi’ian, the ruins of the ancient city of Gaochang—quickly flipping by. The result of a lot of sun and wind shows, as well as the passage of time through beard growth and increasingly wild hair. Cleverly edited to the Kingpins “L’aventurier,” this five-minute-plus clip shows one man’s adventure in a new and very entertaining way."


http://vimeo.com/4636202

Breaking the Sound Barrier - You can see it!

I thought this was really interesting - I guess it appealed to the science/physics geek in me.

http://news.yahoo.com/s/livescience/20090630/sc_livescience/whatsupersoniclookslike;_ylt=Au74cVzUh2S.E34KCPFpVpiCfNdF

Basically you can actually SEE the moment the airplane breaks the sound barrier. Pretty amazing and really interesting.

"The phenomenon is not well studied. Scientists refer to it as a vapor cone, shock collar, or shock egg, and it's thought to be created by what's called a Prandtl-Glauert singularity.

Here's what scientists think happens:

A layer of water droplets gets trapped between two high-pressure surfaces of air. In humid conditions, condensation can gather in the trough between two crests of the sound waves produced by the jet. This effect does not necessarily coincide with the breaking of the sound barrier, although it can."

Enjoy :)

Bubble Rings

Bubble Rings

Very cool article and video of dolphins blowing bubbles into a ring and then playing with the rings! Who knew!?!?! These dolphins tip their heads and expel brief bursts of CO₂ through their blowholes; internal forces break the bubbles’ centers open to create tightly structured, spinning rings. The dolphins then flip the rings around, poke their noses through them, twirl them into different shapes — they even bite them in half. It’s evidently one of the best shows in Orlando today, and these aquatic impresarios thought it all up on their own. Enjoy!!! :)

I've been slacking, I know! A new one for Monday morning! :)

http://www.veryshortlist.com/web/daily.cfm/review/1020/Website/zoo-borns/?tp gives you the background and leads you to http://www.zooborns.com/ a blog dedicated to newborn zoo animals. Newborn red pandas, meerkats, a turtle, tawny frogmouth chicks, and an orphan Sifaka hugging a stuffed animal will make you want to change jobs and be a zookeeper that works with newborns. Sign me up! And oh my gosh the hippos is adorable!

So, so, sooooooo cute. :)

Happy Monday!

Facebook Funnies

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nrlSkU0TFLs

Another great YouTube video. :) About Facebook. Really -very funny. :)